Goodbye 2013!

Hey y'all, Kevin here.  Just sitting here awaiting my rice to finish for our Taco Salad, ["it's really just like Nachos right?" Direct quote from Brooke (insert a teasing wink here).]

I'm catching up on what all my friends are saying on Facebook and being New Year's Eve some are sad to see this year go, some can't wait to send it out with Roman candles.  I'm left with a feeling of excitement but also a feeling of numbness.  Maybe it's the fact that the DRASTIC Tennessee winter has left me feeling "exhausted" or maybe it's my own recap, but this year has been a period of growth but growth isn't ever easy.  This time last year we were still reeling from our news of infertility and 'where we do we go now?'  At years end we have selected Bethany as our agency for adoption and today we had our meeting with our "case worker", which seems crazy.

It's not an easy path we've chosen but it's one that we both agree will lead us to a fuller life. Thank you friends who have helped us in 2013 and now on to more awesome things for 2014.  Lots of love from the Maschmeier clan.  Happy New Year and we're praying lots of blessings for you all!
- Kevin

with a song recommendation from Brooke:
'What Would I Do Without You' - Drew Holcombe & the Neighbors

Tins for Tots!

For Christmas, we partnered with friends of ours who are also adopting & decided to do a Christmas fundraiser.  What’s one of the best things about the holidays?  D-E-S-S-E-R-T!   We didn’t advertise the fundraiser, but with just a simple word-of-mouth strategy, we asked our friends & co-workers if they’d be interested in purchasing treats. 

We decided to call it ‘Tins for Tots’ (<<thanks Kathe Legg).  Sign-ups lasted about a month & by December 13^th we had 91 orders! We felt the love with every additional order placed. 

How many cookies does it take to fill 91 holiday tins, you ask?  Well…hundreds…& maybe add another couple hundred to that! 

We had many gracious friends help us not only make additional treats, but to also load all of these tins!

 

Jaye not only made cookies, she also helped cover some pretzels in chocolate on the fly! 

 

Krista & Adria

(I promise we didn’t sample any of these goodies while we worked!!!!!!)

 

 Jesse helped make the marshmallows & then we just organized an assembly line to fill all the tins.

 

What started out as a simple cookie tin idea, developed into tins full of not only cookies but Buckeye’s, marshmallows, & chocolate-covered pretzels.

 

 

After every last treat was distributed & all the tins delivered,  we raised $1,600 towards our adoptions.  How cool is that?!? 

Learn more about the Aguirre's & follow their adoption story!

Thank you to everyone who ordered tins!  We hope you had a **sweet** holiday season!

 

 

 

Merry Christmas!

Holidays are usually hard...well they have been for a few years now. You find happy moments, you learn to smile & schedule every waking moment with 'something' to make time slip by faster. It's how you cope.

This was a great holiday for us & I'm so lucky to share it with him. We started a movie marathon on Christmas Eve & stayed in our PJ's all day. Trevor & Blake came over for dinner. We laughed 'til we cried, ate too much food & all but fell asleep on the dining table.

It's moments like these that make our holidays special. It seems like a big production for 2 adults to sit around a tree & open presents. To watch Christmas cartoons that we've seen hundreds of times. But you do it because it's the holidays.

My dad said this would be the last quiet Christmas for us & I don't know if that's true. I can't allow myself to believe that, but it's a nice idea. I bought Kevin a little fortune-telling book of names & we flipped through each page. I gave him a DVD of An American Tail & he said, 'our kids will love to watch this some day.' We allow ourselves these little moments in moderation because our hopes have the tendency to get away from us.

I enjoyed seeing our family via Skype & got a laugh over our niece & nephew opening the presents we sent them. We'll have Christmas with them next month & it'll be awesome to see them in person.  I loved seeing friends & their children opening presents. First Christmases, new toys, snowmen & first bikes. Thank you for sharing these moments with us.

We annoyed everyone with photos of our Koola & Khloe because they're our kids & no one better argue with me. :) They kept us entertained all day.  For all of these moments, I'm thankful.

In one of my favorite Christmas films, Rosemary & Bing sing the words: 'When you can't sleep count your blessings instead of sheep.' That's what I'm doing now & it's therapeutic in ways I never imagined. I'm so grateful for Christmas & the ability to be in awe of something bigger than I am. I hope & pray that I can hold on to this spirit of thanksgiving throughout the coming months.

My hope is that you all have a wonderful holiday & an exciting new year. I hope that 2014 will be full of new experiences, fresh starts & wonderful memories. Kiss your spouse, hug your kids & have some fun. Don't take a single moment for granted.

Merry Christmas, friends!

Brooke

Tupperware Fundraiser!

If there's one thing I love, it's kitchen organization. I'm seriously not kidding. Buying canisters & storage containers is just about as fun as buying school supplies for me!

Again, we are very grateful for those reaching out & offering to help us bring a new little Masch into our lives. So just in time for Christmas, we're hosting a big fundraiser & it'll run through December 15th!  40% of every purchase will go towards our adoption.  How cool is that?!

Follow the link below to shop & maybe to entice you a little more, we have some awesome prizes for those who place an order!

Prize drawing #1: place an order & you'll be entered to win a Crystal Wave bowl set. (Not pictured, sorry.)

Prize drawing #2: place an order of $25 or more & you will be entered to win 1 of 2 prizes: a travel case or an entertaining tray. (So 2 winners total!)

Prize drawing #3: place an order of $50 or more & you will be entered to win 1 of 2 prizes: a bread keeper or a set of 4 plates & bowls. (2 winners at the $50 level too!)

At the close of the party, we will draw names for each prize (1 prize per winner...let's spread the love, people!) & we will mail the prizes out.

I'm telling y'all, Tupperware has some amazing products & their quality makes them last for years. It's a great investment to keep your food stored in safe, efficient products. (Some of my fave products are the FridgeSmart containers, the Crystal Wave microwave bowl, & these handy dandy cups:

Here's the link to our party:
http://order.tupperware.com/pls/htprod_www/!twx$eparty_ctl.p_guest_welcome?pv_eparty=eb8e228c6536c3985d9dc109d7e55f00
(There's a gray banner with Kevin's name towards the top of this page.  To the right, inside the banner, you will see a link that says 'shop this fundraiser'.  Click that & your order will be included!)

Share this with your friends & remember to get your orders in by December 15th!

Simple Twist of Fate

As I type this, Ingrid Michaelson is singing 'Keep Breathing' & it's reflective of my mood right now.  We have been holding our breath for the past couple of weeks.  We submitted our formal application for adoption right befor Thanksgiving hit & we were told it would be weeks before anyone would look at it because of folks being on vacation.  So we wait.

All we can do it keep breathing... 
   

...this just in: 
 

OUR APPLICATION WAS APPROVED!!!!

Seriously...that was God's timing.  I am always amazed at how He surprises me. 

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Welcome December with Tireless Hope

As Adoption Awareness month comes to an end & we consider all that we are thankful for, we wanted to extend our thanks to all of you who have enveloped us with love & support.

We've been in a period of waiting for a couple of weeks now, but hopefully the beginning of December will bring the next step in our adoption process.  (I think we have that 'hurry up and wait' thing down now!)

There is a song entitled 'Snow' by Sleeping at Last that we love.  The title of this blog is a line from the song that Kevin & I have considered a mantra over the last couple of years.  I hope this lovely video gets you into the Christmas spirit & gives you hope as well.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSxMqyiVfsM

So we'll sing carols softly, as sweet as we know.

A prayer that our burdens will lift as we grow.

Like young love still waiting under mistletoe.

Welcome December with tireless hope.

~B&K

Mary Kay Fundraiser

I know I say this all the time, but we really are surrounded with the best folks.  So many have offered help & support to us through this process so far & it's been completely humbling!

 

A friend, co-worker and Mary Kay consultant approached me about having a fundraiser & I said, "why not?" :)

 

Now, I'm a HUGE fan of Black Friday shopping so I suggested we have the sale start from Friday, November 29th & go through Sunday, December 8th.  It's a 10 day sale & the profits will go directly to bringing Baby Masch home!  So if you or someone you know loves Mary Kay products, it's a win-win situation! 

 

You can place an order in a couple of convenient ways: call or text Miranda Haley @ 615-573-8975 & email beautifullymade79@gmail.com. Payments are versatile as well: you can pay with cash, check (if you're local) or credit/debit card!  When ordering, use the code BAK with Miranda so she knows you're including your order in our fundraiser!  You can check out all of their products by going to www.marykay.com but please place an order by phone or email with Miranda. 

 

Remember the 10 day sale starts this Friday! 

 

If you have any questions, feel free to message me or Miranda.

 

Thank you!

                                                                                    

 

Gold Coins

Two weeks after my 31st Birthday, I was still flying high off of the sweet, generous gift from my husband.  We made plans that week to go to our credit union & officially set up our adoption savings account, plus we had our first appointment with our adoption agency.  Needless to say, it was already a BIG week of adoption stuff happening. 

The day after our adoption meeting, I spoke to my mom on the phone & told her all the details.  How much things cost, a timeline of events, for I felt about the agency, etc.  She asked me towards the end our conversation, ‘so how much more do you think you need to get all of this preliminary stuff done?’  I responded, ‘I don’t know but I think it’s around $1,800.’  Not much else was said about finances & the conversation ended quickly after that.

 

The very next day, I rushed home from softball practice so we could see a movie but I wanted to check the mail first.  My sister told me earlier in the week that my belated birthday card would arrive any day & I had a feeling it would be there.  Sure enough, there was an envelope from my sister but underneath it was another card envelope that had my granny’s writing on it.  Since my Granny already sent me a birthday gift, & because it was made out to me & Kevin, I figured it was an anniversary card for us since that was coming up in a couple of weeks. 

 

I couldn’t take the suspense so I opened my Granny’s card first.  Have you ever had one of those moments when you are reading something but you’re not believing or comprehending what’s on the paper in front of you?  Well, I was having that moment!  There was a very simple greeting card enclosed but also tucked inside was a check for $1,800!  I started bawling my eyes out in the middle of our driveway & ran inside to tell Kevin.  (Thankfully none of our neighbors were around to witness this!)  He was in the living room playing guitar & as soon as he saw me he flipped out thinking something terrible had happened.  I couldn’t speak so I just shoved the card into his hands & he had nearly the same reaction as me.  We called Granny right away & after making sure no one put her up to this, she told us this story about where the money came from... 

 

Several weeks prior she mentioned to my dad that some items were just sitting in her safety deposit box.  One of these items were some gold coins that my Papa had purchased when my sister & I were little with the intent that we could sell them one day as a part of our inheritance.  My dad can be quite convincing when he wants to be, so he talked to her about pricing out the coins to see what he could get for them.  If they were offered a good price, then he’d sell them & split the profits between the two of us.  Obviously he was offered a great deal on them & they decided to sell. 

 

So while I was on the phone just one day prior to this, telling my mom how we needed $1,800 to get the process started, God provided & it was delivered the next day!

 

Before we made the official decision to adopt, we felt like we were in limbo.  We still clung to the dream of getting pregnant & miraculously having a child of our own.  We also struggled with other options (should we try an IUI, In Vitro, Eastern medicinal treatments...)  We just didn’t know which path to take.  Within weeks of us making the decision to move forward with adoption, God opened all of these doors to prove to us that not only is this dream possible but that it’s what He wants for our lives. 

 

After years of heartbreak & discouragement we FINALLY had a tangible hope on becoming parents. 

 

Thanks to all.

 

Brooke

 

 

Y'all ready for this? {{yard sale results}}

When we first announced our yard sale a couple of months ago, friends & family began donating goods that we could try to sell.  We were gracious to take anything, which resulted in our house looking like this:

Having a lot of stuff to sell at a yard sale is a good problem to have, right?  We thought so!  (Even if we did feel like the walls were starting to collapse in on us!)

 

Early on, we were humbled by the amount of people offering to help us with this event.  So many of you graciously advertised, collected donations from church groups, small groups, classrooms, small businesses, & co-workers.  First, we want to thank Lindsey & Tony Sparrow, who opened their home & gave up a lovely weekend of family time to host the event.  Next, I want to thank our dear friend Heather Miller, who coordinated so many things, helped keep my sanity intact & offered encouragement from the very beginning.  My good friend Amy was an amazing friend for helping us the night before & the early morning hours of the sale.  Then last but not least, future Baby Masch spoiler's, Trevor & Blake were up all morning, wheeled & dealed some folks, fed us pizza & boxed...boxed...boxed up stuff.

The Dream Team:

Heather & Lindsey

Blake & Trevor

 



After 2 truckloads & 4 cars full of yard sale merch, we were ready for Saturday morning to get here so we could get rid of this stuff!  Amy D. sorted MOUNDS & MOUNDS of clothes (10 cent hose…) & we all worked ‘til we were delirious, then called it a night.  Kevin & I got up around 4ish to start the day. 

We littered Donelson with signs (some were pretty goofy…again, we were delirious the night before!) Then we started unloading everything along the Sparrow’s long driveway.  Our first customer, the lovely Jessica Jackson, arrived at 6:45.  She found some treasures & asked to pray with us before she left.  What a blessing that was!  I was running on about 3 ½ hours of sleep so, yes, I got a little weepy.  This was just a tangible reminder of how many of you prayed for us that day! 
 

The entire day was a blur.  So many people came by to shop & we sold just over half of the donations received!  When asked how we had accumulated so many things, I was able to tell people how we decided to adopt a baby & the response was so sweet.  Complete strangers offered prayers, words of encouragement & decided against haggling to ‘support the cause’.  I met so many people who have been involved with adoption.  A woman spoke with me about being adopted 40 years ago.  Another person saw our ad & brought her daughter that she adopted from Ethiopia.  Every story we heard was an encouragement & a blessing!

 

The weather was beautiful until about 1pm & it decided to pour!  After frantically getting everything inside their garage & under the carport, several people still showed up to shop.  We even had a shopper rummaging through everything we boxed up to donate to Thrift Smart! 

Towards the end of the day, Heather asked if I wanted to count the money.  But I’ll get to that in a minute! 

Let’s skip to this past weekend in San Diego.  My best friend Tiffany Goodrick took it upon herself to coordinate a yard sale to benefit our adoption.

Complete strangers donated items to sell & the turn out she had was well.  Seriously…we are just blown away by the generosity of others!  We got really excited when people driving by decided to shop the night before as she was trying to set up! 

She texted me asking how much I had hoped to earn from their sale.  Honestly, I was just honored that she thought enough of us to do something like this & I didn’t care how much they raised.  When I responded back with, “$400?”  She said, “sorry, we didn’t raise that much…”  Immediately I responded saying, “It’s OK!  Any bit helps…” She was being sneaky, though, & texted “we sold $200…”  (a minute ticked by)  “…plus $300” (another minute passed) “…plus $100”, “plus $200”. “Plus $200…how much is that?”

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? 

Not only did they get a lot of gracious yard sale customers.  So many people simply donated money to the cause.  Our hearts are full…that’s the only way to explain it.  What an unexpected, AMAZING gift!

Let’s go back to our yard sale when Heather & I decided to count the money...

She put her banker’s hat on & immediately sorted through everything.  She looked at me & said, “How much did you hope to raise today?”  I said.  “Umm…$600?”  Smiling, she put her finger down on one stack of bills (all $20’s) & said “There’s $600 right here.”  I’m sure my eyes bugged out at that moment considering there was about 8 more stacks to go…She grabbed my phone, pulled up the calculator & told me not to look as she tallied everything up. 

 

So by the end of the day, we earned $1,708. 23!!!!!!

We had easily tripled the amount we had hoped to earn at this fundraiser.  We immediately went outside & had everyone guess as to how much we raised.  Kevin was the closest with a guess of around $900.  You can imagine the hootin’ & hollerin’ in the Sparrow’s diveway at that point!

I still have to pinch myself when I think, “we raised almost $3,000 towards our adoption in just two weekends!”  It doesn’t make sense in my mind!  I know I’ve said this multiple times already, but WE ARE SO GRATEFUL to all of those who helped us, for all of those who gave, & for all of you who prayed!  So many people told me afterward that they prayed for us the entire day.  Even though they weren’t able to come, they supported us in prayer.  That means so much to us & we definitely felt the prayer. 

 And the sale isn’t over!  We still have items listed on Craig’s List & Ebay we’re hoping to sell.  (Does anyone need a Kindle Fire for Christmas???)  And we took a LOAD of books, CD’s, DVD’s & VHS tapes to McKay’s. 

 McKay's loot:

Again…A MILLION TIMES…for the rest of our lives…until we’re blue in the face…we thank ALL who helped this November in bringing Baby Masch home! 
 
With love & thankfulness,

 Brooke & Kevin

 

 

 

San Diego Yard Sale!

We want to share the amazingness that was our yard sale this past weekend, but FIRST we have an announcement...

The yard sale is moving to the Pacific Time Zone! 

This Saturday, from 7am-12pm, my best bud Tiffany Goodrick is hosting a yard sale benefiting our adoption.

The event will be held at: 
7733 Blue Lake Drive
San Diego, CA  92119

Send me a message if you need more information.  Spread the word with anyone you know in the area. 

In regards to the Nashville yard sale:  We're still crunching the numbers & selling product.  Once we have a final total of what YOU helped us earn, we'll post the official word. 

As always, your support & generosity have left us in awe. 

Thank you!

~Brooke & Kevin

31

Kevin likes to make his own gifts, which is so thoughtful.  Some of the most important things he has given me have been given on hand-written cards (like asking me to marry him).  I have a box I keep these mementos in to look at from time-to-time. 

On my 31st birthday this year, Kevin made another card for me with a very interesting piece of paper tucked inside the card. 

I was so confused when I looked at this initially, forcing him to explain the meaning behind it.  You see, when we officially made the decision to adopt, we couldn't even think about the costs involved.  The costs are too great & we knew there was no way we'd be able to afford it.  We have been working towards becoming debt-free, we want to buy our house & we needed a new car (because our 1 and only Saturn has been dying a slow, painful death this year).  All of these things require lots & lots of $$$. So when we decided to make that leap into the adoption process, we knew it would be a major step of faith.  As Kevin looked at me expectantly, hoping I would put the pieces together of this gift, he finally gave up & explained it to me.

Earlier this summer, Kevin decided to sell his Starbucks stock & figured it wouldn't amount to much. He had hoped there would be enough to put a little towards recording a new album, paying off a credit card or just into our savings.  Little did he know that his stocks were worth about triple what he anticipated!!!  So this 'check' for $3,000 was a portion he delegated to give me for my birthday to jump-start our adoption fund. 

*happy tears*

Do I have the best husband or what?  We keep this on our fridge & I smile every time I see it.  My husband gave HOPE for my birthday & that is more than money could ever buy.

If all this were easy...

- Dan Mangan

http://www.danmanganmusic.com/website/ 

Crop to Adopt Success!

We had an awesome time in Cincinnati this weekend!  The Crop to Adopt was a success & I want to thank all of the ladies that came.  We enjoyed so much food, great laughs & we were able to get a lot of scrapbooking & crafting done!

My very gracious mother-in-law Patti, coordinated the event!

 

 

 

 

Dawn, Patti & Patti!

Carla & Jennifer!

Allison!

 

Cindy & Yvonne!

 

...I also want to mention a thanks to Beth & Marsha who weren't photographed this weekend!  I'm so glad I got to see you two!

 

All of these special ladies took part in bringing our future baby home & we are forever grateful for their love & generosity!

 

Plans for a Crop in Nashville this Spring are underway!  If you want to take part in the festivities, keep following the blog for details to be announced!

Tip toe if you must...

 

thank you Heather S. for this motivation today...

Yard Sale!

One Man’s Trash is Another Man’s Treasure!

 

We are SO grateful for the love we’ve received by everyone! We really feel blessed by having such a strong support group in our corner.  A lot of folks have asked us if there is any way you could help us with our adoption.  Well there is! 

 

On Saturday, November 2nd we are having a yard sale where 100% of the proceeds go towards our adoption costs.   Some friends have graciously offered to host it at their home here in Donelson but we need help in acquiring plenty of items to sell.  If you have items you generally set aside for Goodwill, we will HAPPILY take them off your hands!  Please spread the word to your friends, family & co-workers.  We can pick items up from your house if that makes it easier on you as well. 

Items we’re looking for:

·         Clothing (all ages – babies, children, adults)
·         Shoes
·         Accessories (purses, jewelry, etc.)
·         Miscellaneous gadgets (kitchen, tools, etc.)
·         Home Décor
·         Toys
·         Books
·         CD’s/DVD’s
·         Furniture & large items are great, however, coordinating a way for us to pick up would need to be sorted out ahead of time.  We don't have a truck OR a lot of room to store extra furniture.

 

Again, anything you want to get rid of, even if it’s an item worth a nickel, will help us out!  We’ll be so thankful for anything your willing to give. 

 

If you have any questions, or want to schedule a pickup, please email: brooke.a.harris@gmail.com or connect with us on Facebook. 

 

Here are the official details on the yard sale: 

 

Saturday, November 2^nd 7am – 1pm

The Sparrow Household

2605 Lumar Lane

Nashville, TN  37214

(house w/the yellow door)

 

Beverages, snacks & maybe even some arts & crafts will be sold as well! 

  

Thank you all!

Brooke & Kevin

Life is a Gorgeous, Broken Gift

I firmly believe that music can get you through a lot of struggles.  There have been a handful of songs that encapsulate the struggle that we deal with in life so beautifully, that I would listen to them on repeat & they'd almost become prayers for me. 

One that has now become one of my all-time favorite songs is by Sleeping At Last off their Yearbook Album called 'Emphasis'.  It's become so special to me that I've told countless amounts of people about the song, the band & even a sweet friend sent me this gift:

Life is a gorgeous, broken gift...

 



What's cool is that a year ago he released the sweetest music video for it. It gave me chills (& maybe a tear or two) when I first saw it.  Enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tuLfT54jS8A

Crop to Adopt

 

On October 4th and 5th at Clough Pike Baptist Church in Cincinnati, Ohio we will be having the 1st ever Crop to Adopt fundraiser.  This will be a great opportunity to get long-neglected scrapbooking done & to have a fun fellowship with other ladies.  There will be door prizes & raffle drawings as well. 

You have two options for purchasing table space for this event: 

·         $10 to crop on Friday night only.  (6:30 pm until whenever you get tired!)

·         $30 to crop from Friday night through 4:00 pm on Saturday

               Bring an air mattress or sleeping bag & make it a pajama party!

Snacks & drinks will be available all weekend.  On Saturday we will serve breakfast & lunch. 

T-shirts for this event are also available!  Add $15 to your registration fee & request your shirt size. *Order by 9/18

You may send in your registration fee to Patti Maschmeier via USPS. If you’d rather pay electronically, you may do so using PayPal. Contact Patti for PayPal payments. 

 

For more info, email: pattymaschmeier@gmail.com

Clough Pike Baptist Church is located at 1025 Clough Pike,
Cincinnati, OH  45245

We hope to see you there!!

Pack Your Bags

We all have milestones in our lives that stand out in our minds perfectly.  If we close our eyes & think about a day or a moment, we can place ourselves back in time & remember every nuance like it was happening all over again. 

 

…Picture day, 2^nd grade.  Falling off my bike after school due to a race-gone-wrong with my sister.  Her carrying me home, a bloody mess & all.  {Brooke}

 

…Canoeing down the White Water River with my dad.  We had all gotten out & I was caught in the current & taken down stream.  I was scared & my dad grabbed me & carried me back to shore.  {Kevin}

 

…Walking down the aisle & seeing Kevin’s face smiling back at me.  {Brooke}

 

…My last basketball game.  I played my heart out, really gave it my all & my coach took me out of the game.  As I walked back to the bench the crowd stood & clapped for me.  {Kevin}

 

…Our first big vacation for our 3^rd wedding anniversary to Vancouver.  Seeing the Evergreen trees and driving along the Olympic Peninsula.  Ferry rides.  Delicious food.  We felt free.  {Brooke}

 

We store these moments in our little suitcase & when we’re 80 they’ll still be with us to pull out & think about to make us smile.

 

Unfortunately, the seemingly bad milestones tend to make their way into our suitcases too & there’s nothing we can do about it.

 

One particular milestone for us as a couple set in motion what’s become a now 3+ year struggle.  Like most couples we decided to take the journey into parenthood, but what we didn’t realize is that journeying into parenthood cannot be controlled by a road map, an itemized schedule of when things should happen, or even in the ways most expect it to happen. 

 

What I thought about when I envisioned myself getting pregnant: Having a pregnant belly. The feeling of little feet kicking my bladder.  Listening to a heartbeat flutter & seeing a sonogram for the first time. Requesting weird food cravings to Kevin in the middle of the night. Having 9 months to design a nursery.   Having a baby with Kevin's perfectly blue eyes. 

What I didn’t think about when I envisioned myself getting pregnant:  NOT getting pregnant.  Peeing on sticks & taking my temperature every morning before I got out of bed for a year.  Reading blogs about ‘magic foods’ to increase fertility. Bloodwork, bloodwork & even more bloodwork.  (I’m deathly afraid of needles!)  Taking medicines that made me nauseous, irritable & emotional.  Talking to complete strangers about every most intimate detail of my married life. 

 

As with anything else you want in life, when you’re told you can’t have it, you want for it that much more.  The prospect that what you’ve been working for will no longer come to fruition can be devastating. After a year of testing, poking & prodding we were both diagnosed infertile with a less than 1% chance of having children of our own.  We were in shock.  How could this be?  No one else in our family has infertility issues.  Have we done something wrong?  Are we not supposed to be parents?  The questions were endless & our grief was relentless. 

When we prayed for test results, we prayed that it would be a ‘team’ problem.  There would be no blame, no finger-pointing & I’m proud to say that never happened between us.  For whatever reason (a reason we’re just now seeing come into detail) God stitched us together in mind for each other.  Our fertility, or lack thereof, was just as God designed it to be.  We were a pair in more ways than one. 

 

The week we received our diagnosis we took a trip to see friends in Salt Lake City & then toured Utah & Arizona.  We camped at the Grand Canyon, Kevin baptized himself at Zion National Park & we saw magnificent works of creation at Arches National Park.  It was the most beautiful distraction we could’ve given ourselves.  I will always remember that week together where we didn’t have to worry about the future.  We didn’t have to talk to anyone if we didn’t want to.  We were able to be silent & put a hold on life. 

 

Unfortunately, a month later my mom was diagnosed with cancer.  (Remember when God says He never gives you any more than you can bear???  Sometimes I wonder.) We felt numb, inside & out.  The house seemed quieter.  Words didn’t seem necessary.  It felt like the lights went out & we had been abandoned into darkness. 

 

Fast forward to about 9 months later (with Mama Harris in remission - yea!)...God's certainly provided & revealed Himself to us in ways we could never imagine. 

We've cycled through the stages of grief probably dozens of times & now comes the point of this blog:  Are we accepting of our infertility?  Yes.  Are we happy about it?  No. Do we still want to become parents?  Heck yes. 

 

 

All this to say…

 

WE’RE ADOPTING A BABY! 

 

 

 

Does my heart clench when I say that?  Yes.  Do I still feel sadness when I think about our infertility?  Yes, that will never go away.  Do we believe this is what God intended for our lives?  Y-E-S. 

 

We have no due date.  We have no idea where our baby will come from, or what race he or she will be.  We just know that someday in the (hopefully) near future we’ll experience another happy milestone to store away in our suitcase. 

 

On a day where we received one of our earlier diagnoses, we had tickets to see Rosie Thomas at 12^th & Porter downtown.  After the shock of receiving such unexpected news, neither of us felt like going to a show.  Even though we’d been looking forward to seeing Rosie after YEARS of loving her music, we almost considered staying home.  Looking back, going to her show was what we needed on that day more than anything else.  If you know us at all, you know the value music plays in our lives.  Well, Rosie spoke to us that night.  God used her to speak directly into our hearts & give us a gift so comforting, we look back on that night with such gratitude.  The title of our blog was inspired from a song she recorded called ‘Sometimes Love’.  There is a link to it below, but here are the lyrics for you to read: 

 

Sometimes love's a paper tiger
That haunts you in your bed
Sometimes love's a two fist fighter
That lands you on your head

When it comes
Don't try to fight it
There's nothing you can do
'Cause Ii finds you when it does, and leaves you when it wants to

Sometimes love's a perfect poem
That words have never said
Sometimes love's a big disaster
That leaves you good as dead

When it comes
Don't try to fight it
There's nothing you can do
'Cause it finds you when it does, and leaves you when it wants to

So when I come
I'll come insisting
You hear the thing I say
Do not run
Do not resist me
Don't look the other way

We have time
We have tomorrow
We don't need reasons why
Now you have to decide

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4jernJD3L7c

 

Check our more of Rosie’s music (www.rosiethomas.com) because she is just a wonderful musician & an even more wonderful human being. 

  

Many thanks go out to our family & friends who have supported this journey because we haven’t always been easy to be around & we realize that. We believe that this new adventure we are embarking on is really exciting & our hope is that you’ll experience it with us. 

Please pray for the journey ahead!   Pray for our future birthmom, because she will be facing a lot of decisions, obstacles & fears in the near future.  We desire for her to be at total peace in making one of the most important decisions of her life. 

Subscribe to our blog & follow along on our amazing, scary, stressful, yet totally fulfilling adventure.  Here's to lots of new memories to store in our suitcases!

 

Thank you to our dear friends Stef Atkinson (photo), Jaye Haynes (makeup) & Lauren Kaufman (graphic design) for your help with our super cute announcement postcard!